So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize