My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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