I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
