dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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