I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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