i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
