you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
