how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
