Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
