no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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