That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We need to rekindle our bromance
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize