I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
