we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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