im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
