Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i will never coherently bang her
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Operation Purity has been aborted
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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