You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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