Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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