I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
