Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.

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(925): View more from California

Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?

(1-925): View more from California

Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through

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(513): View more from Ohio

Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.

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(214): View more from Texas

That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face

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(503): View more from Oregon

My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..

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(818): View more from California

The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent

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