So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize