Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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