we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Randomize
