Christians are straight up FREAKS
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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