Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
