All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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