what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
There r osticjed everywhere
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
