i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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