Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
