How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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