WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
