when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
