why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
