Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I am available for nakedness
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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