I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
