i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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