it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
