OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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