I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
