I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize