Are we in a gay sports bar?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize