Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
