You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We had sex on a dog bed..
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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