Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
