my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize