i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
