no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize