I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
