They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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