she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Randomize
