You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Reggie can tackle my bush.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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