its not stalking. its research.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
