wrigley field is MILF paradise
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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